In another life... or the post with a lot of "quotation marks".

"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?"
- Mary Oliver

This post is not as much about mothering or parenting but more so about us as women with dreams. I really hope you comment- I think the responses could range from inspiring to hilarious, from humbling to ridiculous (see my long commentary below!)

Ahem... I've been thinking a lot lately about my life and how it is different now than I thought it would be. When I was in high school, I had a dreamy, naive idea of what my grown up life would look like. I imagined I'd be hustling from one audition to another, or I'd be doing a show night after night in New York. I thought that it was a far-fetched idea at the time, yes, but I also could imagine it. I could see my "name in lights". I know- so silly, right?

Well, not really... I was given this insane imagination and the gift of this imagination is the opportunity and necessity to dream "Big". I thought that life would fall in line for me along a path that I perceived was right. I think in the back of my mind, I was nervous that I might not make it... and looking back at the talent I possessed compared with the talent out there... I know I would NOT have made it! :) This is not a sob-story or a poor-me "I'm just a teacher" whine, because I love what I do. I feel like I get to "perform" every day and have adoring fans all around me! (Ha! Little kids are so good for the ego!) So, in a way- I am living my high school dream- in just a very different way.

When college choices loomed, I told my dad that I was going to graduate High School and head to New York to start auditioning. He said... "No way." He required that I do at least two years of college and then I could go do whatever my dramatic little heart desired. Looking back, I could have left- I was 18- legally able to be on my own. But that thought never crossed my mind. Maybe I was relieved to not have to venture out on my own just yet. I applied to a school whose drama department I loved but then didn't get accepted. Then, my fall back school became my only option. I enrolled, joined the drama department, and got involved in student ministries. I realized that in order to be successful in theatre, you don't need a drama degree so I started pursuing other Major options. Enter: wild imagination... Pre-med for a day (I envisioned myself a part of Doctor's Without Borders- saving lives all over the world- Oh! the drama!); communications for a day- (Of course, newscaster, interviewing important people in the middle of life changing events- dodging bullets to get the good story); Youth Ministry for a day- (Saving souls, y'all! What more important work is there? I would be the best at it... but also incredibly humble, of course...); Psychology for a day- (new treatments, saving people from the dark recesses of mental illness, seeing break through after breakthrough); oh, yeah and education... (the person who is every child's most influential voice- who inspires, challenges, and changes lives.) From this list, you can see I have a bit of a savior complex... how many of these are about saving the world, changing the world, saving lives?

I think that's where a lot of teens are when they envision their futures. And that's all fine... we should dream... we should envision ourselves adding positivity to this planet, changing lives, helping people, challenging each other, and adding goodness not hostility to our daily lives. But, somewhere in the middle of all of that, I followed a nudge and ended up in Art Education. Now, for someone who also wants to be respected for their intelligence and wisdom in their career, art education is not exactly the most respected field. In many schools the arts are the first thing cut, the first thing to go by the wayside in honor of testing, math, etc. But with that savior complex, comes intense passion. I am intensely passionate about the value of art education... I know that I'm doing more than just teaching kids about color mixing, tone, value, composition and art history. I'm teaching them to express themselves in a healthy way (hello, psychology), to connect with their inner creator thus tying themselves tighter to the Great Creator (hello, youth ministry), to communicate with each other about important social and global issues affecting our visual world (hello, communications) and of course, keeping an eye out for the physical, social, and emotional health and well-being of 1000 kids a week (hello, Doctors Without Borders).

So, in essence, I am LIVING THE DREAM, baby! But, in another life- a life that could have gone in a different direction- fulfilling my childhood fantasies, I would have been on Broadway. Yep, my name in lights...

instead...

and I think that is more than fine...

So, in another life, where would you be? Not at the expense or loss of your current life. We all know and understand how wonderful our kids are, our jobs are, our lives are... but, if you were to dream big, baby.... where would you be? What big, wild, irrational things would you be doing?

Dream big, ladies... I'd love to hear that I'm not alone in my teenaged (and sometime adult) wild hopes for my life!

Love to you, ladies.
S